Interlude III

So finally, three days late, I get to write this blog post. Hooray.

This chapter was the first one I ever planned out in detail - the Doctor finally explaining why he and the Master have always had such a convoluted relationship. The End of Time (however many years ago it was) brought this backstory straight into my head, and for me there were enough hints in their dialogue through the years to make this completely within the canon. The Doctor was always considered a failure and an outcast by his own people, as was the Master. It would only be natural that they were drawn to each other, and that it would turn into something else.

It is such a relief to get this story out there at long last. It has been sat bubbling in my head for years.

The Master's canon has had a few continuity problems over the years, but I have to admit that my main fandom - as great as the old episodes were - was always with Christopher Eccleston and David Tennant. I grew up watching them, and so I prefer to use the story that Russel T. Davies gave him. It also gives some substance to someone who could otherwise have just been considered 'evil', which in my opinion, he never ever was.

 This really is the crux of the story - a story that has been in the background of the Doctor's life since childhood. Like a mystery story, I've been dropping hints about the nature of this relationship right from the first chapter, but perhaps they will only start to become apparent now. If you decide to go back and read the previous chapters (which - if you don't - I wouldn't blame you), little things may start to jump out at you that seemed unimportant at the time, but actually were written with huge significance in mind. It was the only way I could think to frame the story I'm trying to tell. It also makes some of the interactions they have in the show a bit more telling. I always thought there were several layers to everything they said. Having known each other for nearly a millenium (from the Doctor's side), of course there would be more in everything they said than what it appeared to be. That phonecall becomes much more telling. While, of course, it retains the basic 'enemies trading banter' layer, there's more at work there than that. Look back at it (I believe there's a youtube version) after this interlude, and you'll see what I mean. It also explains why the Master has always had such a Doctor fixation, even pre-reboot.

Just bear in mind that there are always several (sometimes conflicting) reasons for the way they interact - both conscious and subconscious. You can't say that this relationship is clear-cut and simple to understand, because if it was... well... they wouldn't be the Doctor and the Master.

I wanted to keep the Doctor's description of their history fairly broad, since one of the appeals of Doctor Who in general, and Gallifrey in particular, is that it's mysterious. While we get a few glimpses of the Citadel, and the Doctor describes a little in Gridlock, nobody wants to get bogged down in the details. Hopefully the Doctor explained just enough to get Jack to understand, while leaving enough open for interpretation.

Yes, Mummy liked the Master. I didn't just dump that in for fun, by the way - there is a reason for it. Also, it gives a bit more substance to her decision to vote against the Council: she realised that not only was it putting her son in danger, but it would (or already had) ruin his and the Master's lives. That moment of realisation must have been heartbreaking.

Besides, in my experience mothers do tend to like bad boys, which - let's be honest - the Master probably was. How could he be anything else?

The naming thing... well, that comes back to the phonecall again. There's a lot of conflict in the canon about the naming of Timelords, but in the RTD era it was always implied that it was a rite of passage, just like staring into the Vortex was. It's just a personal opinion, but I like to think that the Master chose his name partly because he was already on the descent into madness, but partly because he wanted to irritate the hell out of the Council. 

We've had a lot of deep thought processes and dark moments recently. Being faithful to the style of the show, we needed a bit of comedy. That section about chips was really fun to write. There was a bit that had to be cut out, due to length, the dialogue of which went something like this:

"I like chips. Chips are good."

"What, they run out of bananas today?"

Jack: "Do you ever eat anything else? How are you not ridiculously fat?"

"Well I run."

"By choice?"

"Now that is a good question. If I ever find out the answer, I'll let you know."

It's a shame, but sometimes length is important (no pun intended) and this interlude was already rather long.

Also, let's just appreciate how sneaky the Doctor can be, and the fact that he actually cares about what Jack's been through lately. He didn't just go to Cardiff on a whim.

"What, did you marry him or something?"

I apologise for the teasing. Apparently writing the Master means that some of his psychosis has leaked out into my brain. I couldn't resist - and neither could the Doctor. Reading that little section back still makes me smile.

I also honestly believe that if it had been something as 'simple' as marriage, the Master would have killed him already. Does that make sense? Probably not, but then sometimes neither does the Master.

I didn't really want to have to write that section about the 'r' word, but in the end I suppose it needed clarifying. I've been quite vocal about the subject in the blog, but it was still lingering in the air around the fic, and I wanted that out of the way before we went any further.

Comparing the Master to Gray is something that leapt out at me quite recently, but they make an interesting parallel, and it allows us to put the Master's madness into context, rather than concentrating on him as simply 'the bad guy'. Taken out of semi-mythical Timelord status, who is he at heart? Why is he the way he is? And comparing Gray and the Master; Jack and the Doctor, who did the worse thing?

Obviously we're going into deep morality here, and there is no right or wrong, but it's an interesting idea to think about. Or maybe I've just spent too many hours doing literary research, and I'm thinking too deeply about it. In any case, hopefully to comparison to Gray will put the Master in a slightly different light for some readers.

 Link to the chapter is HERE

The burning of Japan, as a section, is now my favourite. We've moved out of the dark, and ours and Jack's understanding of everything is starting to come into the light. While the Master should still be considered dangerous, insane, violent and potentially murderous, we're starting to get into his motivations a little bit more - as confused and twisted as they can be. While attempting to rationalise everything he does would be ridiculous, we're getting a sense of his - as the Doctor said much earlier - 'essence' (because we already know it still exists, even if 'Valiant' Doctor isn't sure). There is still much left to be discovered though, so keep your eyes peeled, and what I consider the absolute key to his personality will only be revealed close to the very end.

While I can't estimate how many more words there will be in this story, plot-wise we've reached the half way stage. It seemed about time that the Doctor began to explain, so that we could make sense of what we've seen, and start to look a little more thoughtfully at what comes next.

 The next section will be taking us into familiar territory for the Doctor. He needs a chance to stretch his legs. This is - after all - still Doctor Who: as weak a position as he's being forced to operate from, the Doctor is still the Doctor, and the story needs to play out as much like an episode as possible (because in my head, what I'm writing is simply an unaired... um... slightly more adult-oriented episode). This means that there will be no sex scenes for a while; however we will get more of a glimpse into the Master's - and the Doctor's - minds, and the way they interact.

There's a few bits in the next section that I am looking forward to immensely in my own strange little way. Again, telling would constitute spoilers, but trust me - there is quite a bit more epic drama on the way, and the Doctor's motives in showing Jack this story are maybe not what they seem.

And music... the two songs that always remind me of this part of their story are:

How to Save a Life - The Fray
Somewhere only We Know - Keane

There's also a piece of music from the Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban soundtrack that makes me think of their history. It's called A Window to the Past, and was used rather a lot when I was planning this chapter. 

Music tastes matter in these things, so they may not be your cup of tea, but I'm fairly eclectic when it comes to music, and my inspiration comes from strange places.



AND AGAIN

Thank you so much for the support so far - today Lost Boys reached 15,000 views, not counting the views on AdultFanFiction. I'm not just saying this because I'm expected to, but - really, thank you. You really do have no idea how much it all means.


I am now back on hiatus until mid-January. Once more, essays need to be written. I really did want to get the Christmas Day (on the Valiant, that is) memories out of the way, but that section is important, and I don't want to rush it. Well... I suppose they're all important, really, but you know what I mean.

In the meantime, if you want to contact me I'm always available. You can PM me on fanfiction.net, leave me a review, or comment or email me here. I will always reply - it's great to talk to other people who love Doctor Who as much as me.

Until January then,

Turkaholic

Vaguely Story Related Festive Stuff

I was hoping to have gotten a little further in the story by now, so that the Master could say this for me in his own bitterly sarcastic, mocking way; however due to the nature of writing, and the nature of real life (which, unfortunately, tends to carry on despite my best efforts to stop it), I will have to say this myself:

Merry Christmas.

The next chapter is currently half-written on my laptop, but it's currently 1:45AM on Christmas morning, and if I attempt to finish this now, I could ruin it. That won't do - this interlude is pretty much the crux of the whole story, and it needs to be as good as I can make it. Much of the Doctor's speech in this interlude has been growing for years in my strange little head.

Ever since The End of Time was first broadcast (I grew up with David Tennant as my first Doctor, and the end of that episode had me - as a tough, angry teenager - in tears for both characters), this story has been evolving, and this scene is one of the first that I began to plan in detail. Of course, I first imagined it taking place with Donna in the place of Jack, but oddly enough I'm beginning to think that Jack really was the better choice (and not just because of the male romance - you'll see what I mean when the chapter is up).

 It will now probably be Boxing Day (the 26th to all you non-Brits) before the next chapter is possibly up. I have a pair of young nephews who accidentally leaked to me that their mum has brought me a laser screwdriver for Christmas (I love collecting stuff), and both of them having sonic screwdrivers of their own, they've told me it's my duty tomorrow to chase them around the house all day, laughing manically and trying to shoot them with it.

I really am a big kid at heart.

Have a great day, everyone - whether you have Christmas where you are or not.

Chapter 38

Again, there is more going on in the Master's head right now than meets the eye. Thankfully, the next scene is an interlude, and finally the Doctor will begin to explain why they interact in the strange way they do.

Forehead kisses. Forehead kisses are a thing. Timelords have a thing about foreheads, in my opinion: just see the shower scene for what I mean, and look at the way the two of them interact in the building site in The End of Time. Of all the actions in this chapter, and all the things the Master said, that apparently random kiss is one of the most important things he's done so far.

 If I talk too much about what just happened, then I'm going to spoil the interlude, so I'll leave it here for now. That last sex scene, however, will be the last one for a while. We have an overarching plot to deal with, and Jack and 'Future' Doctor have some stuff to get through before the end.

Thanks again for all the support - I've needed it these last few chapters, knowing where it was heading (Caring about the characters you write is a double-edged sword sometimes). Let me know if you're enjoying what you read? It would be a huge boost to hear.

You can find the new chapter HERE

Chapter 37

The Doctor and the Master's sex scenes have a lot of layers to them. Seriously. I don't know whether all of them come across on the page, but when I write them there's a vast amount going on, and not all of it is about the sex itself.

Normally, when the Doctor and the Master are... intimate, it's almost about recapturing something they've lost (the shower scene is an excellent example of this being actually shown). While that's still true here, this is more about who they are now - who they've become since the Doctor ended the Time War, and the Master became... lost?

I don't just write sex scenes for the hell of it - this scene had a point which hopefully you picked up on. If not, then let me remind you of something the Doctor said to Jack just before the first sex scene:

'Like opposite poles of a magnet, we attracted.'

Obviously, there are more layers to what just happened than that, but that is a main point of the scene.

Lots of what I'm writing is subtle - there's a very delicate balance between the two of them which I hope I've been capturing adequately. Even the small facial expressions - the flickers in the Master's eyes, or the twitch of his lips - have a huge significance. They all come with an internal dialogue (that I'm not going to share... unless you ask me).

Let me also make something clear: the Doctor is not your cliched, 'average' bottom. The only reason he ends up there is because the Master by this point would never let him top. It doesn't really make a difference to the Doctor which position he's in, but the Master has... well, to call them control issues would be a bit of an understatement.

 Both of them have issues, some of which will be addressed very shortly. The next chapter will be the last before the interlude. It will not take us to a happy place, but it will (hopefully) give a few more hints as to the Master's incredibly twisted mind, his feelings towards the Doctor, and just how emotionally stunted he is (sometimes I hate him as much as I love him).

Also, let me just remind you of how much of a hero the Doctor is being: he's been confused, pelted with insanity and mass-murder and trauma and his brain is still actually functioning enough to care about the Master, the Earth, and Martha.

Bravo, good sir. Bravo.

Chapter 36

I've never had to review a sex scene before. This should be interesting...

I always have trouble with sex scenes, especially with this pair. The Doctor may be bottom, but in my head there's a really weird sense of equality in their sex scenes. It's difficult to explain.

 The Master could have done anything to the Doctor on board the Valiant, but the fact is that he didn't. There was no torture, no rape (I won't even contemplate the idea, it would take the Master beyond sympathy), and while he might have lashed out occasionally, there were reasons for this (insanity being one of them). I honestly don't think that the Master is capable of that kind of personal violation (his really dark side is all about spectacle). I'm hoping after the next interlude, the power balance between the two will begin to make more sense.

Clothes. Clothes are a pain. Trying to get them off in a realistic way is a chore, especially when neither the Doctor or the Master are in any fit state to deal with undressing. Hopefully I handled it fairly well.

Another point that gave me trouble was... ah... preparation. Like I said - both of them are pretty much frenzied in this scene. The only thing I could think of was the Master using his own... uh yeah.

I do research my sex scenes - the technical side of it, anyway. I have it on excellent authority that... that word (I hate it) is a very good lubricant. One thing about the Master - he may be a human-hating mentally unstable egomaniac, but for many many reasons - he doesn't want to cause the Doctor that kind of pain; not in those moments, and not in that way. (Again, the Doctor will be explaining a bit very shortly).  

I omitted the word because I hate it. Seriously, if there is a word that is sure to detract from a sex scene, it's that. Precum. Oh... ugh. Why isn't there a nicer way to say it?



I honestly cannot think of anything else to say about this - the actions should speak for themselves just this once.

 As an aside, this is the song I was listening to while writing this scene. Normally their sex scenes need something a little more calm, but this is sex on the Master's terms, in the Master's psychologically twisted world. I needed something a bit dubsteppy. (The words have nothing to do with what's going on in the scene, by the way. I intend to post a full playlist here at the end of the story.)

Anyway, thanks for looking, and hopefully we'll be coming to the final chapter of this set of memories some time today or tomorrow.

Chapter 35

I had to literally work myself up to writing this scene. At my very heart, I am a lover of fluff, and writing the Master and the Doctor those fluffy moments are few and far between (though they are worth it when they come around).


This scene is - in some ways - one of the most important so far. How to explain without spoilers? There are so many aspects that it's difficult to say.

The Master has his own motives, which will for once be explained by the Doctor in the next interlude. Suffice to say that this is him at his absolute worst (as far as the Doctor is concerned) - vindictive, childish, and spiteful.

While he might attempt to kill the Doctor, or occasionally lash out with the odd inappropriate backhander across the face, he respects the Doctor in a very odd way - he is, after all, a fellow Timelord (the only other Timelord at this point), and not another filthy ape. Their history also goes some way towards protecting the Doctor from the Master's absolute fury.

 The Doctor, however, is also at his worst in this scene - we've seen shadows of it in him before - for example in The Runaway Bride when he stood watching the Racknoss drown and Donna had to practically slap him out of it. This is the side of himself that the Doctor has been scared of all along, and if there's one person who can pull it out of him, it's the Master - the person who is both a reminder and a temptation of it.

The burning of Japan has been leading to this moment. This is a huge turning point in the story of the Year that Never Was, as well as a turning point in Jack's (and our) understanding of that relationship. While they do honestly still love each other (I don't know why I still make that word so small - it should be painfully obvious by now) that connection between them is sort of more complicated than that.

There are some aspects of this chapter that I am absolutely in love with. There are bits of dialogue here that have been in my head since the story began to grow:

"Because I really do have a secret... I know you."

The Master and the Doctor often do echo each other's words (For example 'It's not fair!' - spoken by the Master at the end of Last of the Timelords, and by the Doctor at the end of The End of Time.), and there was a line in Last of the Timelords, spoken by the Doctor, that always bothered me:

'Because I've always had the greatest secret of all... I know you.'

It felt like we were hearing one side of a conversation - one that had obviously taken place while the characters were 'off-camera' on board the Valiant. This scenario simply sprung to mind every time I watched it.

"I win... I WIN!"

Again, we're echoing Last of the Timelords. The Master - let's face it, can be ridiculously childish. You do not sit in the Prime Minister's office, drinking brandy and watching the Tellytubbies unless you are just a teensy bit childish.

Basically, this is the Master and the Doctor at their most feral and furious. We're beginning to come back to some stuff that was said in earlier chapters here:

"It hurt... it still hurts."   "Of course it does."

"On some level I think I wanted the door to open, so that I could pour all my rage and grief into him."

"It wasn't him I was afraid of... I was scared of myself."

"Oh Doctor, and you think we're so different."

(Those quotes may not be verbatim - I can't remember what chapters they're in).

The Master has known since the phonecall that this side to the Doctor existed - it's something they share. So why bring it up after two months? That will have to wait until the next interlude.

That's it for now. Once again, thank you so much for your support. It really does make a difference.

I'm not sure when the next chapter will be up, but hopefully within the next few days. I'd like to get onto the next memories before Christmas is over.

Until next chapter, 

Turkaholic. 

Apologies, explainations, and a mid-fic ramble.

I just wanted to apologise for the delay - I am literally writing the next chapter at the moment, however the burning of Japan has been leading to this scene, and trying to write it well is a bit of a task.

 I refuse to abandon this story, no matter how tough it gets. Oddly enough, it means quite a lot to me, but I choose every word very very carefully, and trying to capture the characters (especially in this scene) is time consuming and grey-hair inducing.

 I'm hoping to have the next chapter up by the 17th, but that depends on whether it gets rewritten (as important chapters tend to do, with me) and other real life events. In any case, I wanted to just say thank you for the continued support, and remind you that this is not abandoned.

 Once this scene is over, I (or, at least, the Doctor) finally get to share some important stuff - stuff that I've wanted to share since I first watched The End of Time and this story began to form in my head. Not all the answers will come out - there are some things that will be held back until nearly the very end (even if it is frustrating holding on to them), and some stuff that will only make sense in the Epilogue (which I'm so excited about).

Due to the really bizarre nature of the Doctor and Master's relationship, some things will have to be explained in the author's note at the end. I am not a perfect writer, and the only way you could completely understand would be for me to write the Master's thought processes, which would be a truly terrifying 'stream-of-consciousness' that would make Virginia Woolfe look like Harry Potter. The Doctor will attempt to explain somewhat eventually, but a full explaination of the character - or at least my interpretation of him - will have to wait until the end.

 Timelord love is difficult to write; trying to explain it without ruining the plot is even more difficult. 

 I have only these suggestions: read between the lines, listen to 'future' Doctor, use Jack's eyes. Look at what is and isn't done, and what is and isn't said. This is a puzzle in the shape of a fanfiction, and it needs you to remember what happened in the show as well as what happened in previous chapters.

And... things in the early chapters should only now begin to make sense.

Timey-wimey, wibbley-wobbley. That is the only reason that I can give for the way this has been written.

I would estimate we're about half way through now. Trying to write the entire year day-by-day would make me as insane as the Master, and the Doctor has his motives for picking out only the important bits. 

If you haven't worked out why yet, then I'm a really terrible writer. 

You're welcome to message me on Fanfiction.net or here. If you've got any guesses about certain stuff you can ask me (I won't post spoilers in public, but I'll be happy to tell you in private, and I'd love to hear what people are guessing). 

Now I have to face the horrors of writing this next chapter. While there's nothing truly harrowing in it, there's a part of me that desperately wants to write them with copious amounts of fluff. Unfortunately, these two come with a certain level of trauma attached.